My parents repeatedly tell me that they migrated from Poland because they wanted an adventure and an opportunity for a better life. We have often discussed their experiences and hardships they faced when beginning a new life however, I had never reflected on how much the language barrier left them isolated, that cultural difference made them feel different and as such, they had initial problems reconciling their Polish cultural identity with their identity as Australians.
MAMA
My Mama Alicja Plizga was born on the 25th September 1961 in Tomaszow Lubelski, Poland, but grew up in the small suburban city Lubin, Poland. She left Poland in 1982 at the age of 21 when she escaped to Germany while touring Europe with a traditional folk dance group. Alicja (or Ala) lived in Germany for a year until the Australian government granted her and her boyfriend (my Tata) refugee visas. The greatest challenge Ala faced with the Australian identity was the language barrier:
‘I felt embarrassed when people would speak to me and I couldn’t understand. One day I went to the Safeway on Acland Street to do some shopping and as I was leaving the woman at the register said to me ‘can I check your bag?’ and I said ‘no thank-you’, frustrated she kept on repeating herself and I kept on replying ‘No, thank-you’ realising that we were not understanding each other.’
By not being able to converse or understand everyday language Ala felt closed off and limited, unable to express herself and her feelings. As a result she felt that she could not be herself freely in Australia. Ala then found stark differences between Australian and European culture which made acculturation difficult:
‘I remember being shocked every time I would shop at Coles at Barkley Street. The supermarket was filled with homeless people, working girls, immigrants and I would always find half eaten food and wrappers on the ground that the customers had eaten without paying. To me it was incredible and out of this world. Firstly these types of people were unseen in Poland because everyone had a job in the communist system and we were a strict catholic country so we followed rules and not many people were different.’
Initially Ala felt that Europeans shared a high culture whereas Australian culture was distinctive. She viewed Australians as easy going and without social structure and ambition. To her Europeans had higher ambitions and so she thought that Europe was far superior. Later she discovered that acceptance and the lack of established conventions of behaviour and expression was freedom and that this was a positive non-judgmental approach to life. She then viewed Australia as reflecting virtues of egalitarianism, classlessness, ‘a fair go’ and stoicism’ 
TATA
My Tata, Andrzej Dariusz Marton (Melon) was born the 25th January, 1959 in Lublin Poland. He left Poland at the age of 21 and worked in Germany for two years. He was unable to return to Poland because the borders closed in 1981 when Martial law was announced in order to ‘defend socialism.’ He assisted Ala and three other Poles escape into Germany and would have been in danger if he returned. He then immigrated to Australia. The biggest obstacle he faced in merging his identity was the disparity in culture:
‘If you went outside in the streets people would be wearing tracksuit pants and slippers, I even saw people wearing ripped t-shirts to the bank. In Poland people took pride in their appearance and presentation. You would never step out of the house in Poland without looking like Chapel Street.’
Because of this cultural trend, Melon had the feeling that Australia was backwards and Europe was in front. Initially he didn’t like it and could not come to terms with it. However he realised that Australians have a completely unique culture which is relaxed and indifferent.
The different way of life amazed Melon. In Poland or any place in Europe, the individual lived in a city. When Melon moved to a suburban area he felt as though he was living in the countryside and as a result felt isolated from the wider community. Although he was with his girlfriend, he still found it difficult to come to terms with this experience of aloneness and distance. He also felt detached from the rest of the world:
‘Everything in Australia was isolated- the geography, even the news and politics. Living in Europe, especially in Germany everyday there was news and politics about the world. In Australia I felt shut off from the rest of the world. The first five years were the hardest because we didn’t have the money to return to Poland to visit family and friends.’
The physical distance of Australia to Europe and the lack of communication with the rest of the World left Melon feeling disconnected. This hindered his acceptance of his new identity. In addition the language was difficult to understand which made communication and connecting even more challenging.
‘This was difficult to learn the language, especially the accent because I was working 16 hours a day. But I had to do it. After studying I could work with Australian people because I could ask questions and understand the culture and way of life. Slowly I became more positive to Australian society and culture and I realised that if I wanted to be a part of this culture I had to be positive. So every opportunity I had to talk with Australian people I did and this helped me a lot.’
Both my parents had difficulties bringing together their Polish identity and going forward with their Australian identity. However today they comfortably and proudly call themselves Australian. The key, they say to reconciling identity as an immigrant is to remember your roots but have an open mind and support the country that you are living in
The Geographical Distance resulted in a feeling of isolation and disconectedness and this made reconciliation difficult.
The Empty Shelves during Martial Law. Circa 198
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